Tropical Smoothie Cafe in Arvada

“I got the Mr. Hands smoothie (horse ejaculatory fluid, and naturally crushed methamphetamine) and really enjoyed it. I could feel the sperm wiggling in my mouth. There was also a man snorting some white china nose sugar on the counter to my left (the man in the photo). Made me feel at home. This is by far the most exquisite dining experience I have ever had the liberty to indulge in. Top tier. Good bless America!!!“